The saga of the glasses

Once upon a time, a young woman went to visit her aunt. Her aunt looked at her prescription sunglasses and said "when did you get those?"
The woman replied "when I was fourteen".
"But you're eighteen now."
"They still fit."
"They are little girl glasses Helen."
"I like them!"
"You are a woman. You need grown-up glasses."

And so, the woman went with her aunt to a magical place called: The Lenscrafters of L.A.

Something you should know about this woman: She is me (well, duh.). Also, she has RIDICULOUSLY expensive lenses because her prescription is really really bad. So, having her lovely aunt buy her prescription sunglasses as a graduation gift was a happy happy thing.

And thus began the saga of the glasses.

1. We go to get glasses. But, little cousin, while a darling, is two, and therefore makes life a bit of a hell. Finally, two exhaustive hours later, a pair of sunglasses has been picked out.

2. They do not have the lenses in stock. They will have to order them. Okay...

3. I am now home, sans glasses. They haven't gotten the lenses in yet.

4. Two weeks pass. They still do not have the lenses.

5. I call them. The lenses have arrived. VICTORY! Except, they have a major scratch in them. They shall have to order them again.

6. About three weeks pass. I am really nervous at this point, because I am leaving for college in a few days, and I need those glasses!

7. I leave for college. I am now at college, sans glasses.

8. Finally, two months after the glasses are initially ordered, they arrive near my college. I do not have a car...

9. After a week, my roommate and I go to pick up my glasses.

10. Triumph! My lovely lovely grown-up glasses.

11. They are TOO BIG. I try to get them adjusted. Apparently, this is impossible. My prescription is so very bad that the glasses frames cannot be bent small enough to fit my freakishly delicate face because the lenses are practically as thick as old-timey coke bottles.

12. Finally, my grandmother is able to give my a lift out to the Lenscrafters AGAIN so that I can bring the glasses back. They try to get me to but another pair of glasses while I am there and to exchange them. I get a scary scary look on my face. It is the look of fear that this will start again. They give me a check.

13. I deposit the check. So, now I have money and no prescription sunglasses. After almost THREE MONTHS the saga is over.

14. The saga of how to spend the money begins. Maybe I should go to Mexico and drink me some Tequila (just kidding Mom).

The moral of the story is that if you have a bad eyesight you do not deserve grown-up prescription sunglasses. You should just give up now.

I still have my little girl prescription sunglasses though, and they still fit, and I still like them.

ModernHelen