Dear College Course List:
Why do you hate me?? You have been posted on the internet for almost no time at all, but you are clearly intent on destroying my peace of mind and my ability to awesomely get a double major in English and Philosophy and a minor in Biology.
Why have you maliciously aligned yourself with Saturn, that foul and odious sign of disorder and chaos, with the sole purpose of scheduling all of my desired classes either at the same time or at terrible sad times of death??? Why am I probably going to be in class from 11 in the morning until 9 at night on Tuesdays WITH NO LUNCH BREAK. I mean, I will end up with eighty million papers and tests due on Tuesday! It will be not of the good!! AHHH!
Am I that abhorred? Is this the universe's way of telling me to pick one major?
Well, I refuse! I NEED to double major because otherwise I will feel as if I am not getting enough education. If only I didn't have to fit in the French... if only I could do more than 18 credit hours a semester... if only I was a super-human cyborg with the capacity to go go go non-stop for hours and hours at an end without stopping.
Maybe I just need more coffee....
Well, I need to get my head out of THE FUTURE and return to the present where I have two papers and a test that require my attention... I hope that this does not end up being a HORRIBLE failure of a plan. How lame would it be to have most of the credits for two majors but not enough credits for a single one? And I have to graduate in four years because my scholarship runs out and I cannot afford this school without scholarship....
Sincerely,
ModernHelen
PS: Everyone should read the book Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. It is an amazing amazing work. The author beautifully blends depth with light-hearted playfulness. She writes with the kind of humor I would love to write with someday. Except, I probably won't because the only fiction I seem to be capable of writing is genre fiction, namely horror, which I'm sure says something about my psyche...
PPS: I am planning on updating the fun quotes next week, so hold your collective breaths in anticipation for that monumental occasion!
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