Megan

Hey! I'm finally resuming posting again. I was frazzled by the start of the spring semester, but I am back and ready to blow your minds away with the scariness of my blog posts. My blog-stalkers may resume blog-stalking...

I promised Megan that I would write her a blog post after she displayed the epicness of her personality. Megan is a crazy blond woman who lives in my wing. She is obsessed with Harry Potter and has a hat that looks like a happy lion that I once unsuccessfully tried to steal. She swears humorously and has a contagious Russian accent.

So, the other day...

Ashley and I were making cupcakes. Even though we failed due to the chemical engineering major who was helping us adding THREE AND ONE HALF cups instead of ONE AND TWO THIRDS cups (I hope he never makes this mistake with plutonium...), we ended up with carrot cake and halfway decent cupcakes. I ate two cupcakes and two pieces of cake as well as a massive pile of coconut pecan icing, which was frankly amazing.

The resulting massive sugar rush compounded with a random crush on a guy that I just met to create an estrogen fueled temporary madness.

Me: Oh my god! I totally like that guy! A Lot! *bounces*

Ashley: You just met him!

me: Leave me alone! *Giggles in a manner some have judged hysterical*

Ashley: You had too much sugar.

Megan: *enters dramatically* Hey guys!

Ashley: Helen has a crush on a guy she just met!

Megan: Who?

Me: Don't you dare say anything!

Ashley: I'll tell you later.

Megan: Tell me in the hall.

They both leave. I stood there frozen in sugar fueled paranoia for a minute. I changed my shirt. Then, the sugar screamed CHARGE and so I ran down the hall to Megan's room.

Me: *pounds on door*

Megan: *opens door two inches and stares out with one crazy eye*

Me: Is Ashley in there?

Megan: *in a suspicious manner* No

Me: Can I come in?

Megan: No.

Me: IS ASHLEY IN THERE???

Megan: No, she's in the bathroom.

Me: Can I come in?

Megan: No. My eye is watering from the air coming through. *eye twitches creepily*

Me: Can I look for Ashley?

Megan: She isn't here.

Me: ASHLEY! DON'T TELL HER ANYTHING!

Megan: She isn't here!

Me: Why won't you let me in to look for her!!

Megan: Because... I have naughty things on the walls*.

Me: What?? ASHLEY!!!

Ashley's voice (coming from the bathroom): Don't freak out Helen.

Megan: I told you she was in the bathroom!

Megan: (To Ashley) I told her that you were in the bathroom!

Me: Did you tell her anything!?!

Megan: I know about a guy who has a two syllable name.

Me: Ashley!

Megan: I know two letters of the two syllable name.

Me: You better not say anything!

Megan: *in a sudden insane Russian-accented rant* You know what? I know who he is. And I will find him. And I will torture him until he like you. And I guarantee this work. I am like matchmaker. I am like portable dating site. I know this. I have had three boyfriend. I have one, he my boyfriend for three years!

During this rant, Ashley was staring at Megan and I, and I was watching my crazy distended face in a mirror as I laughed and laughed and laughed.

Then people came to see what the heck was going on, and I keep right on laughing.

Me: *suddenly* I now have to go now to watch a movie now with people! *Runs away*

And that is the story of Ashley, Megan, Helen, and TOO MUCH SUGAR.

ModernHelen